Thanks for Giving the Universe its Energy

Dear Energy Lady,
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the U.S., and I've been reading all kinds of things about why you should or shouldn't eat turkey, how to cope with your relatives, and when to start shopping.  It seems like what used to be a simple, fun holiday is now complicated with a lot of political and social decisions.  What does all this do to my energy?

Signed,
Feast or Famine?

Dear FF,
It is interesting to see what has happened to Thanksgiving.  As you say, there are those who argue that the traditional dinner is no longer a feast, but an exercise in gluttony; or that it is necessary to avoid turkey to be sustainably correct.   Still others insist that it is a day for finding bargains, while others declare that shopping should be avoided at all costs so you can focus on family.

Energetically, these are simply points of focus.   They mean nothing in and of themselves.  What does impact your energy, though, is how you feel about them.  If a particular point of view annoys or upsets you, it adds density and static to your energy field.  And if it generates a lot of negative thought, then you will also experience the corresponding negative emotion.  Those emotions are creative, and will likely cause you to experience connections to events and people that will not be to your liking.

So if that's not your intention or desire, then don't take the bait.  Let the arguments swirl about you without getting attached to them.  Instead, set your intention that Thanksgiving will be joyful for you.  Then simply smile and breathe, and either enjoy or be amused at everything that happens.

Regardless of your choice of attitude or action for the day, don't get too seriously about it.  Just lighten up, relax and be open to whatever gifts the day holds.

Remember this:  When you give thanks for everything that happens, you create a blessing, and you give the universe positive energy.  Eventually, that will come back to you in one way or another.

So Happy Thanksgiving!  I hope the holiday is rich with life and love for you.

Love,
EL

Hard-wired for pain?

Hi Energy Lady,
I have a question:  is it possible to be hard-wired for pain?  I really, really, really try to be positive, but no matter what I do, it seems like I flip right back into painful, negative thinking that makes me feel awful and results in experiences I don't want.  I'll take any suggestions you have.

Signed,
Would like to be pain-free

Dear Free,
Actually, it is possible to be hard-wired for pain.  The science of neural plasticity talks about the fact that neurons that fire together, wire together.  What that means is that once you've had a trauma of any kind and you keep replaying it over and over in your mind, neurons connect and "wire" together.  So as you say, you can try to be positive, but that's like putting frosting on a brick.  The first lick might taste good, but when you bite into it...ouch!

So what can you do?  It's possible to have an enlightenment experience similar to what happened to Eckhart Tolle; one day, deep in depressive thought, he said, "I can't live with myself any more."  What happened next surprised him; he fell into a deeply meditative state, and when he came out of it, he could see the radiant energy fields of everything and everyone around him.  Very nice, but not an experience you can willingly duplicate.

Rather than try to unwire the pain, try rewiring some new experiences that feel good.  This is not positive thinking, which has a heavy downside, as each "high" state contains its polar opposite for balance.  Instead, think of a pleasantly happy, peaceful state.  Something you might call relaxed or "chill."

The way to start this is simply to affirm, "I choose happiness."  Then just relax, smile and breathe.  Don't try to define happiness--that will likely start bringing up all kinds of thoughts and reasons why you can't have it.  Just stay generally in the "happiness" realm for a while.  Hum or sing.  Keep smiling.  No need to build yourself up; just be with a not-negative state of mind and being.

The other thing you can do is when the painful, negative thinking comes up, pretend it's a character on a TV show you're watching.  That will separate it from you, and make it a little cartoonish--kind of like watching "reality" TV.  As long as it is separate from you, its vibrations aren't as hurtful.

This said, and you know that I'm not a medical professional of any kind and make no medical claims for any of what is said in this blog; if you think you might need medical help, seek it.  There are wonderful doctors and counselors in the world who are dedicated to helping people with conditions similar to yours.  There is qualified medical help, and it's widely available, even if your funds are limited or non-existent.  

Know this: there is great love in multiple dimensions for you.  Embrace it.

Love,
EL

I want more respect!

Dear Energy Lady,
I hate the way I'm treated at work.  No one respects me.  My boss won't give me any opportunity to advance, and I get cut out of key meetings.  At this rate, I'll never get a raise or get what I want in life.  What should I do?

Signed,
Overlooked

Dear Overlooked,
I could tell you that your boss is a jerk or that life's unfair, but from an energy perspective, that's not what's happening here.

You asked the question, "What should I do?"  In energy work, it's not what you do, it's what you are.  So the correct question is, "How can I BE to get the respect I want?"

First, you need to define what you mean by respect.  If you're trying to control other peoples' behavior, that's force, not energetic power, and it will backfire on you.  Trying to force anything basically says to the universe that your energy is NOT a match to it, which is why you have to manipulate it verbally or physically.  Even if it works in the short run (you get people to say "good morning!" to you, for example), in the long run, it's exhausting for you to keep up, and the response you're looking for disappears.

But if what you mean by respect is a feeling of peace, safety, trust and belonging, then start questioning your thoughts and beliefs.  For instance, if you get don't get invited to a meeting, stop interpreting what that means and just take it at face value.   Everything has the meaning we give it, so if the meaning you're giving it is making you unhappy and lowering your vibration, stop it.  Either don't give it any meaning at all, or give it an alternative  meaning, like, "they're meeting so they can plan how to include me in the next big project."  (But if you don't believe the latter, don't try to "think positive," as it will only backfire energetically.)

In other words, start respecting yourself by refusing to harbor and intensify hurtful thoughts about yourself.   And if you want an opportunity to advance, stop waiting for someone else to give it to you.  If it doesn't exist at your present company, just say to the Universe, "I'm ready to work in a place where I bring tremendous value and I'm respected for my contribution to the success of the organization."  Then keep your eyes and ears--and higher self--open to signals of where you might go or what else you might do.

In other words, no one is responsible for your low vibrations but you.  And if thinking of work just makes you more miserable, spend more time taking care of yourself in other ways.  If you want to feel good, start by doing things and thinking thoughts that make you feel good.  That alone may be enough to start changing your circumstances for the better.

And one more thing.  If you want to get respect, you have to give it.  So make sure that in your quest to be seen, you also see the needs and hopes of others.  Respect those, contribute to those, and you might be surprised by the progress you make.

Good luck!

Love,
EL

Inspiring Others

Dear Energy Lady,
Something interesting happened at work today.   They announced a sales contest, and I sometimes win these.  And I like to win; it certainly beats losing.  But as they talked about the details, I couldn't get excited, and I don't know why.  They gave us a clear picture of what we needed to do, and the rewards are terrific.  What happened to my energy?  How do I get it back?

Signed,
Flat-lined

Dear Flat,
You just discovered something important about energy: it doesn't come from outside you.  You could say that it's in you, or that it is you.   What's outside us gives us the contrast we need to create an identity we can use to navigate physical life.

In your case, maybe you think of yourself as a salesperson, and this has come along to let you ask yourself if that's still true.  Or maybe you're a different kind of salesperson than you once were.  Or it could be that you're simply no longer motivated by money or prizes.  As Grace Farrell says to Daddy Warbucks in the movie "Annie"--"Do you really only love money?  You know it's never going to love you back."   So perhaps you've discovered that winning is fleeting, and you want something more.

Or maybe not.   Consider how the message was delivered.   Was your boss upbeat and excited, or was he/she concerned that things are not going well, and that the contest has a certain level of scarcity and concern attached to it?  It could be that the "normal," you, the one who really loves sales contests and winning, picked up on the "static" of the concern, and it just didn't resonate with you.  So maybe it's just the message, or the way the message was delivered, and not you.

Here's the thing:  energetically, what resonates with us is whatever allows energy to move through us, use us productively or lovingly, or live as us in our most authentic state.  And that's usually something that's tied to being loved, valued or respected.  So if your boss only presented what the contest was and how you could go about winning it, but forgot the "why"--the inspiring reason why everyone should get involved and excited--it's not likely that you'd get engaged without you supplying that reason for yourself.

If that's true, then ask yourself, "What's my 'why?' for this?  What feels right and good and true about this?  How will it impact others if I win?"

Then close your eyes.  If you can feel the result and resonate with it without doubt or concern, then it will likely be easier to get excited.  But if you find that you still can't connect to it, then ask yourself, "what is it I truly want...and why?"

I'll write more about this in coming weeks.

Love to you,
EL

Energy of Obamacare?

Dear Energy Lady,
I'm curious about something: what is the energy of Obamacare?

Signed,
On the fence

Dear Fence,
This is an interesting question.  When it was first conceived, I believe the energy was quite high, as the intention of the program was to make sure all Americans had access to affordable healthcare.   That is something that if life-giving and life-affirming, so usually, there's lot of hope, inspiration and high vibes associated with anything like that.

But the problem was that it was a plan, not a belief.  Had President Obama expressed it as "I believe that all Americans should have access to affordable healthcare," both political parties would have likely agreed, and discussions could have focused on something that would have made all the lawmakers look good and their constituents happy.  But no one wants to share credit or collaborate in Washington right now.  So a plan was created, but plans immediately polarize people, who immediately begin attacking and/or defending it.   When that happens, the original energy stalls.

It's not surprising, then, that today, there are some people who love the new plan and have had no trouble registering, and others who hate it and can't or won't register.  The energy is stuck.  That's one of the reasons why the website works in some cases and not in others; it's reflecting the state of those entangled with it.

Here are a few things that would get things going again:
--a freshly-stated intention by both parties that affordable healthcare is important to all Americans
--a bipartisan agreement that any program has to be cost-effective, and not raise the national debt (which all Republicans and many Democrats feel is important)
--inspiring stories about both people from all political parties who are getting well because of their new-found ability to access care
--making sure the technology of the website works without fail, 100% of the time

Short of these, prayer for the highest possible outcome would help, as would a focus on the facts, not the emotions surrounding the program.

Thanks for asking.  It will be interesting to see how this plays out.  In the meantime, I know I'm sending good vibes to all the lawmakers, and I hope you will, too.

Love,
EL

Get ready, get set...

It's Sunday night as I write this, and I'm wondering how many of you are dreading the start of the new work week.  When you saw the title of this blog post that said, "get ready, get set..."  were you thinking, "Oh no!  Here we go again!"  or were you thinking, "I get to GO into a bright, new, shiny week!"

If you're one of the people who can't wait for Wednesdays because that's "hump day" (meaning that you've gotten over the 'hill' of the first three days of the week), then my guess is that energetically, you're dragging a lot of negative energy into your new week.  If you are, here are a few tips that will make this week a lot easier:

--Whatever happened last week, let it go.  Even if you had a fabulous week where everything went right, tomorrow, as Scarlett O'Hara says in 'Gone with the Wind,' is a new day.  Energetically, when you let go, something new can enter.  If you're already at a high vibrational state, then something even higher can enter.  And if you are or were at a low state, something higher can come in.  Either way, you win.

--Walk into work singing, or if you can't bring yourself to do that, then at least humming.  And if you can't hum, dance your way in the door.  I don't care if you are an attorney in a buttoned-up firm; you've got music in you, and that vibe will take you a lot farther than anger and worry and a "do battle" attitude.

--Remember Dr. David Hawkins' scale of vibrational increase.  Force does not equal power.  You have power.  You ARE power.  You do not need to force anything.  And when you do think or actually force something, you shut down your power.  Just let it flow.

--Smile--at least 15 times a day.  The average American child smiles more than 400 times a day; the average American adult, less than 15.  If you smile at least 15 times a day, you'll automatically feel better, since it's impossible to feel bad when you're smiling (try it if you don't believe me).  When you feel good, you vibrate higher.  When you vibrate higher, what you create and attract through your vibratory state is bigger and better.

--Stop trying to "figure things out."  Use your intuition--particularly for your most difficult problems.  You'll get better answers.  Paying attention to your problems only energizes them, giving you bigger problems.  Using your intuition will help solutions come to and through you.

--Laugh every day this week.  No matter what you're doing, enjoy being you!  And don't take yourself or anything too seriously.  Everything in life is changeable, and remember: everything turns out all right in the end, and if it's not all right, it's not the end.  :)

Love,
EL

Are you happy today?

Dear Energy Lady,
Got any ideas on how to be happier?  It seems like every time I try, I get let down.  I'm tired of hoping for things that don't happen.

Signed,
Disappointed

Dear Disappointed,
What you're saying is that you can only be happy if certain things that you hope for happen (if I'm understanding you correctly).  So you raise your hopes that those things will happen, and if they don't, or don't happen the way you hoped they would, you don't feel you can be happy, so you're not.

From an energy perspective, you're doing it backwards, or at least a lot harder than it needs to be.  By withholding your happiness, you're keeping your vibration low.  By keeping your vibration low, you almost guarantee that the thing you want to happen, in a way that would make you feel good, is almost impossible.  This is because 1) you're not a vibrational match to it and 2) you'll have to try doubly or triply as hard to get any kind of result at all.

So try this:  Stop hoping or expecting.  I'm not saying to give up hope--just to set it aside for now.  Same thing with expectation.  Right now, your expectation is that you're going to be disappointed, so you keep manifesting more disappointment.  So set aside any expectation, good or bad.

The next time you do something, do it because you want to do it.  Take as much pleasure as you can in the doing of it.  Just stay as present and as focused on the activity itself as you can.  Don't think about where it's leading or what could come of it.  Just enjoy!

In that state of enjoyment, your vibration rises, and the energy flow begins.  Let it make you feel as good as it does.  Be as satisfied with it as you can be.  It's ok if it's not perfection or bliss.  Try smiling as you do whatever you do; it's biologically impossible to feel bad when you're smiling.

So just relax and enjoy being you and doing what you do.  Without placing conditions on that, more happiness can enter, naturally.  Be aware of that.

You can also keep a gratitude list; many people have found that counting their blessings makes them feel happier.

Love,
EL