No energy for relationship

Dear Energy Lady,

I have tried everything--and I do mean EVERYTHING--to make my relationship work.  To my girlfriend's credit, she is trying, too, because we both want to get married.  We're in counseling, but it's not working.  What we once seemed to have is just gone--there's no real spark left.  What's the matter with us?

Signed,

Weary

Dear Weary,

It's simple: stop trying.  In the act of "trying," there is tremendous energy expenditure mixed with that great energy killer, doubt.   Once you relax, you can start being with the relationship as it is, and then see how natural it feels to both of you.

Remember: energy is in a constant state of change.  The more you try to keep things the same, the faster they will change.  Use the counseling to explore where things are now, not where they once were.

But if that doesn't work, remember the 7 words that will change your life (from Rosita Perez):  "When the horse is dead, get off."

Love,

The Energy Lady